Mirror of my soul – Stories of you, me, the world and eternity

When our search for The One leads us Home


This journey can really get you down.

That’s why I always said I would pay a decent amount of money to see some Twin Flame stand-up comedy.

Seriously, I would.

The good news is, I’ve found the next best thing!!!  emorolf2

I am sharing this HILARIOUS video from the very talented Akasha & her friends, aka Twin Flames In Progress because I want YOU to smile today. This wild journey seriously needs a injection of humor. Laugh, hug yourself (or a tree! :)) and be OK with this journey.

You are not alone – and you are not crazy.

For more amazing poetry, articles and videos see http://www.akashatorres.com


Do you ever get the feeling your beloved speaks to you through music? Maybe a song will suddenly start playing in your mind, or certain songs with a special meaning come on every time you turn the radio on? Maybe you find certain tracks which remind you of them “follow” you; on the radio, TV commercials, public places, random stranger’s ringtone  – you name it, it’s there – to the point of driving you mad. Maybe your beloved actually speaks to you in song lyrics, prompting you to look the song up only to discover it carries a message? Or maybe “your song” randomly starts to play on Spotify the moment you feel the familiar vibration of his energy embrace you?

All of the above are types of telepathy that can occur between a pairing of “twins.” Telepathy is undoubtedly one of the most fascinating and popular aspects of this connection. Although not exclusive to just one type of connection, the twins vibrational and energetic resonance lends itself easily to this type of communication.

True telepathy engages our whole being – mind, heart, body and soul – requiring not only the mind to translate the flow of energy into a language which can be understood by the recipient, but also the heart chakra to act as a transmitter of all the emotional and mental information. Many twins first awaken to the reality of telepathy through the activation and opening of their heart chakra. More than any other part of the energetic body, the heart is the essential thinking, feeling and knowing center of a multi-dimensional being, generating a powerful electrical field 60 times greater and a magnetic field 5,000 times greater than that of the brain. The crown chakra also plays a role, by connecting us to our Higher Self, Universal Consciousness and the Divine realms.

Whether physically present or not, we recognize our beloved by the unique energy that they convey. We may feel a quickening of our heart, sense their presence or smell their fragrance. Sometimes we feel a caress on our hair, cheek, hand etc. We may hear their voice, or perhaps feel their warmth surround us. Telepathy however isn’t just about learning to recognize the moments when the “twin phone” buzzes; it is about having the ability to LISTEN to the incoming message.

An interesting aspect of telepathy is how the beloveds use music & songs as telepathic aids in order to share messages & emotions. Although this kind of telepathy often gets dismissed as “wishful thinking”, it is in my opinion one of the best ways we have to reach each other. It is a particularly wonderful way to connect with a beloved we have yet to meet. It can also add an element of fun to times of separation. Music in itself is a powerful telepathic transmitter: not only is it inherently spiritual but its notes are easily carried by electromagnetic energy. It’s octaves and frequencies act as vibrational conduits of the energy of love connecting the lovers. Best of all, such telepathy requires no special musical talent – only an open heart and a receptive mind.

Music, at its essence, is the sound of spirit. Yet many people underestimate the significance of music as a telepathic tool and fail to see the many ways in which it can be used to enhance and solidify the bond between the eternal lovers. Personally I believe this is because music carries a lot of emotion – and the emotional body is where the lovers experience the most blockages. What I mean by this is that when we lack control of our emotional states we will struggle to identify and accept telepathic messages this way due to the added pressure on our emotional body. We will simply not know what is real and what not. Loving messages from our beloved then get muddled up in all the emotional garbage of our past which rises to the surface for clearing.

On the other hand, the ability that music has to stir our emotions makes it a favourite way of communicating for many. The emotional pull of music appeals to the soul hiding behind his 3D mask and empowers it to bridge the gap between the inner masculine and feminine energies, creating a better balance within. It also allows both parties to share feelings, fears and thoughts without coming straight out and saying things that circumstances or fears of rejection do not allow.

A strong spiritual connection is the ideal “test bed” for the evolution of our telepathic ability because the connection naturally drives us within – where all telepathy starts. Music can help open our heart further and make us more receptive to insight. However it is only once we have done enough purging and are able to sit with our emotions without becoming them that we can move beyond the emotional body into the spiritual realms and more easily receive the messages intended for us. Then, our moments of telepathic connection become a little less like this…


And a little more like this….

alicia s daydreaming

As with everything involving telepathy, it is important to remember that your beloved – just like you – is a multidimensional being. This means that songs are not always consciously being sent by your beloved, although I believe most couples experience a combination of intentional and subconscious musical telepathy. Sometimes it is your Twin’s Higher Self interacting with you – and although his 3D self may be aware of this at some level, it may not be as much as you think. Do not let this dishearten you. Believe in your beloved’s ability to embody his higher self here on earth and to unify his heart and mind. Continue to love him as you see him; as a soul, as his full glorious self. Practice unconditional love without expectations and learn to receive the telepathic messages with an open heart trusting that whatever your Higher Self allows through is for your own benefit – and always in support of your spiritual evolution.

Although telepathy is instant and happens automatically, music can be a wonderful way to gently push those telepathic experiences to the forefront of your beloved’s conscious mind. Something magical happens when you download a song into your spirit and project it outward through a connected heart space. Such songs become powerful spiritual tools that can stir a soul to consider the true nature of love, connection and Union. Music thus sent forth with truth and intention can easily penetrate through mental barriers and ego. For this, choose songs that elevate your Spirit and make your heart fly; songs that will remind them of your time together, or which include a specific message you are trying to convey – perhaps with lyrics that mimic something one of your once said. That way there is no mistaking where the music comes from. Classics such “Total eclipse of the heart” by Bonnie Tyler are also a wonderful choice; they are cosmic messages of love filled with the kind of vibration that resonates deeply.


I often get asked how to start trusting ourselves when it comes to telepathic messages in general? After all, how do we know that we are not simply crazy and imagining it all? There is no “one size fits all” answer to this I’m afraid. Yes, there are people who have completely dived off the tracks of sanity in the pursuit of the elusive “Twin flame.” You will find these people spending thousands on psychics, looking for external confirmation for what is happening WITHIN. If this is you then I would simply say, take a step back. Breathe. Feel around for solid ground. However if YOU in the heart of your hearts KNOW this person is like no other, twin or not, even when it makes no sense, then trust your intuition. Seek balance within you to get through this.

Knowing that your beloved is sending you telepathic messages through music is like everything else on this journey: it requires faith, inner trust and knowledge of our Self. Learning to trust telepathy is a process – and feeling each other across the distance is an ESSENTIAL part in it. We must fight those inner demons that doubt the truth of the connection INSIDE OUR OWN HEART. After all, a true, lasting reunion with the external beloved can never happen without the discovery of the “beloved within”, which is the complimentary energy they represent and which forms part of who we are.

Just know that while you work towards these things you are not alone. Spirit will give you signs and synchronicities in order to build that trust and to confirm the existence of such telepathy in order to prepare you for future messages. Spirit may for example give you both the same song – and then allow you to discover it. When this happens, not once or twice but a dozen times, you will start to believe in what is being shown to you.

An example of this from my own life is when I reunited with my beloved after three years separation, pushed by my kundalini awakening and an inner knowing which told me to return to him.

One day as I was out shopping alone in New York, Edith Piaf’s “Milord” started to play in my head. “Allez venez, Milord, Vous asseoir à ma table, Il fait si froid dehors, Ici, c’est confortable...” It was a song I barely knew which made it particularly odd. That night, as I returned to his flat and stepped in through the door, I immediately heard he was humming that very song. He confessed the song has been playing in his mind all day and commented on how odd it was, since he hadn’t heard the song in years.

Although the song lyrics did not contain any special message for either one of us, I understand why Spirit chose it. Had it been a well-known song of the moment, it would not have seemed so extraordinary – there would have been a number of places we both could have heard it. But because it was an old, random French song, it acted as a confirmation of just how easily the shared mind picks up stuff. It also gave me the foundation to receive further messages and insights with less scepticism.

Sometimes Spirit gives not just a song but an entire playlist to both lovers. Here in 3D, many people have playlists that are entirely inspired by the connection and that they listen to in moments of nostalgia. Sometimes we even share this music with each other as a test, to see if the other has received it too.

One night during our brief reunion, my beloved put on a playlist he had created of his “favorite songs”. He apologized in advance for how “cheesy” the songs were going to be. He scanned my face nervously for reaction as the first notes started to play. It was Dido’s “White Flag”, followed by “I want to Know What Love is” (Foreigner), “If you’re not the One” (Daniel Bedingfield), “I knew I loved you” (Savage Garden), “Sail away” (David Gray) and many more. Love song after love song, including “our” song “Total Eclipse of the Heart” (Bonnie Tyler), followed.

Although I immediately noticed many of these songs were songs that I also loved, I didn’t think too much of it at the time. My mind was still playing catch-up, trying to make sense of my kundalini awakening, our sudden reunion, the fact that he still wanted me, etc. It was only after I returned home and put on the mixed tape I had created during our separation that one by one I found myself listening to exactly the same songs. I fell to my knees with the realization that all along he had shared the same yearning with me – I felt certain in that moment that those songs were intended for me, they were about me, about his feelings for me. His playlist acted as a catalyst – suddenly EVERYTHING made sense to me.


There are also times when we – consciously or subconsciously – drop lyrics and songs into conversation both in 3D and 5D. These lyrics carry messages of love and reassurance for the beloved and they always help us increase our understanding of our beloved’s feelings and point of view.

After our reunion I was having a highly spiritual reoccurring dream where I stood at the edge of what seemed a tall cliff, peering into the cloudy darkness below, with my beloved’s voice beckoning me to leap. I knew that if I wanted to be with him, if I was ever going to have that chance; that I would have to take that leap. When I finally jumped I found myself carried by what felt like angel wings and landed in the wilderness. My beloved was no where to be seen. Waiting for me was the book of my life. Even though the pages were empty, he had signed the inside cover, confessing his love and asking me not give up on him.

This “edge”, this metaphor for the call to leave the old behind and to leap into the “new” featured heavily in all my channelled writings and poetry  – all of which I shared with him. I was calling him to make that leap too; to join me in our new life, to follow his heart. I was convinced he knew and could remember his promise to join me.

Within days he randomly mentioned David Wilcox’s song “Catch me if I try”, not really relating to anything else other than that I had just discovered the artist and he said this song was the only one he knew. I felt prompted to check the lyrics out and was amazed to realize they related directly to my desire to leap into the new together. It was as if he was speaking to me through the song lyrics.

Go easy on those eyes
I’m about to lose my grip
Go easy on that smile
I’m afraid that I might slip
Lay off on that calling
and tempting me to try
‘cuz I’m so scared of falling
I’ll never learn to fly

Then you say,
Touch me you can reach me

Ah, you can make me want to fly
You make it seem so easy
Catch me if I try

Tempting me to step off of the edge of reason
I thought that I knew better than to start believing
In Love, Love, Love
And if I read you right
We just might want to dance all night

And I have risked a fall before
But not from this height

When you say
Touch me you can reach me
Ah you can make me want to fly
You make it seem so easy

Catch me if I try…

You can listen to the totality of this beautiful song here.

Funnily enough, over the years he has said many things that confirm the message of this song. Just recently, as I told him I had separated from my husband, he said “How ironic that you seem to have gone over the edge while I am still standing on it“.

The great thing about this connection is that you understand each other at a deeper level. Your beloved does not need to say “Listen to Africa by Toto, it’s a song that makes me think of you”, but rather they can take a line from that song, drop it into conversation with you – even in 5D – and you still get the message. Unless your beloved actually admits to “lyric dropping”, it can be hard to tell whether they intentionally do this, or whether it is an unintentional act revealing subconscious feelings – a sort of a spiritual “Freudian slip”. Maybe the message is from their Higher Self – with their 3D failing to make the connection but speaking the words nevertheless, who knows? The closest my beloved ever came to admitting anything like this was recognizing that we both “love words and the meaning behind them”.

Here are some examples of what I mean by “lyric dropping”.

As my beloved kissed me goodbye after a week spent in New York with him, he told me (with a straight face) “I always want to have you in my radar. It’s gonna take a lot to take me away from you, There’s nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do”. It’s a line straight out of “Toto” by Africa, a song which has an important spiritual meaning for us both. It was also one of the love songs in the playlist he had played for me.

During that same reunion, as he tried to explain what he had felt for me during our initial meeting in Paris, he told me: “Together we could have taken it to the end of the line“. Pretty much a line straight out of “our” song “Total Eclipse of the heart”, which has connected us since our summer together in Paris. It is also the song I use to speak to him in lyrics.

Sometimes Spirit bombards us with musical signs just to get our attention. These sings may include certain songs “following” us around, songs playing in our head etc. This often happens when we are trying to avoid something – our pain, our truth, our growth – or when we have asked God or our beloved to leave us alone but when the opportunity for spiritual evolution is there.

Eight years into my marriage with another man, I was receiving sign after sign telling me to leave the old – including my marriage – behind and to reconnect with my beloved.  One day as I sat in my car, “Lost Between The Moon And New York City” came on. The lyrics struck me immediately, as did “New York” in the title. Spirit has always used “New York” to give me signs regarding my beloved – after all, it was where we reunited all those years ago. It just immediately makes me think of him. I dismissed the sign – I was not ready to look deeper into why he was still on my mind after over a decade apart. However as I switched channels, “Englishman in New York” immediately followed. I just got that feeling. As I switched again, it happened again, twice. Four songs in a row! New York everywhere. Spirit now had my attention.

In those moments when that feeling, that realization hits you, just know you are being pulled into alignment. You are being assisted along your path. Tune into your heart channel and listen. Sometimes the message is just a warm wave of love that envelopes you. Your beloved may be thinking about you, listening to that very song – or not… Regardless, learn how to receive this love without blocking it .

Sometimes we hear a song and we get that feeling, like our beloved is speaking to us through it. We feel that quickening of the heart, that familiar vibration. Sometimes if we are lucky we may receive confirmation – in one way or another – from our beloved that the song indeed came from them – or at the very least was given to you both by Spirit. Again, it’s hard to know how this actually works, only that God is great and works in mysterious ways.

Seal’s 1994 hit “Kiss from a rose” is a love song that’s been around a long time. Seal himself said the song was inspired by a “type of relationship”, however until recently I hadn’t associated the song with a spiritual connection, or my own journey for that matter. Other than the chorus, I had never really paid attention to the lyrics.

Last year I started hearing “Kiss from a Rose” everywhere. It seemed to be on the radio every time I turned it on. I immediately noticed the lyrics and just got that feeling that my beloved was speaking to me through them.

This was during a time that we were getting close again – even though only through online chats. One night he asked me to give each of my children a kiss goodnight from him. I replied “Right back at you”. He replied “Ouch”. He was joking. Then (my heart beats like crazy as I type this lol) he continued: “Your kisses were always special, unlike anyone else’s.. Empowering.. Like a pleasurable pain”.

I almost hyperventilated there and then. It was SO random that I immediately understood why that song had followed me everywhere.

To conclude, seeking peace, connection and Union through music is surely one of the most noble and non-intrusive ways to connect with our beloved – and with ourselves. Music is a beautiful way to heal and uplift the soul, and to rise together towards God. It can even become a method of worship, a prayer; strengthening not only the connection to our beloved but also to the higher realms.

I would love to hear your stories – how has your beloved used music to communicate with you?





A message appears on your computer screen. You two have been at it for hours.

“It was a mystical flow from the cosmos that brought us together that summer. It was only ever meant to be a temporary thing. I never imagined you as a potential girlfriend, wife or soul mate, including during the times that I caressed, kissed or made love to you. I only ever envisioned us having a lasting friendship full of sharing and caring”.

You are gobsmacked.

He is a coward.

Thousands of miles separate you. He would never be able to look you in the eyes and tell such lies – because if he did, you would call him out for it and he would instantly feel exposed. Unfortunately, it has been years since you last saw him.

It’s a low blow – and he knows it.

How dare he! Furious, you type away at the keyboard.

“You are the one who hunted me down, pursued me relentlessly, crossed the line between friends and lovers time and time again – and you know what, that’s ok. All I ever wanted was to have you in my life. Tell me then, if you so care about our friendship, why it is so difficult for you to be just that – my friend?

He tries to formulate a response that would make sense but the truth is he doesn’t have one. Instead, after a long pause he writes:

“Why are you still talking about the past?”

You roll your eyes.

Another message follows. “It is what it is. I could not change it”.

With that, he logs off.

3,470 miles away, on his New York balcony, he lights a cigarette. He only smokes at times of extreme anxiety. Talking to you is definitely such a time.

He knows if he was ever to give into your closeness again, life as he knows it would end.

You only spent a few short weeks together one summer years ago, for God’s sake!


Rewind to Paris, 2001.

To support your passion for travel, you are living the crazy life working two jobs – one of which is an evening job conducting telephone interviews with new car owners in the UK. One winter night, you dial a number in the London area and are immediately struck by the familiarity of the voice on the line. What a beautiful accent! This man is clearly not British. He hasn’t even bought a new car! Nonetheless, there’s an air about him which makes him irresistibly intriguing to you – and the feeling is mutual. He tells you he has never heard an accent as beautiful as yours.

That night, your 20-minute interview turns into a conversation lasting the entire duration of the evening shift as you both marvel at the instant bond between you. He wants to know everything about you. You discover many parallels and shared interests, such as a love for travel and languages. “We recently returned from Peru”, he tells you. You wonder whether this “we” is a girlfriend or a wife but do not dare ask.

That night something extraordinary happens: one by one the entire team gathers around to enjoy the wonderful energy created by your exchange. As interviews go, this is of the once-in-a-lifetime kind. He makes it clear he’d like to meet and wants your number. He asks you whether you ever visit London – which you do – and jokes about you turning up unannounced at his doorstep. At the same time, it feels like he would welcome it. He also indicates he might travel to Paris just to meet you.

Afraid of how your boyfriend might react, you don’t give out your number out but take this man’s number instead. He writes down your name, the name and location of your company and makes you swear you’ll call him.

“You know if you don’t call me I am going to have to come and find you”, he says.

You both laugh.

Unfortunately, despite your best intentions you never call him back. The time never seems right. The toxic relationship you are caught up in makes you fear the consequences of ever making that phone call. You had felt so strongly about this practical stranger (as undoubtedly he had about you) that you know it could never be just a “hello” – something would have to follow.


The following spring, you have just returned home after a long day at work when you receive an unexpected call from your evening job, asking you to come in despite it being already late. Even though it’s Friday night and your 5th anniversary with your boyfriend your team leader impresses upon you how important this is and so you make your way to the office situated on the outskirts of Paris.

You are right in the middle of conducting your first interview of the night when he walks in. Facing sideways to the door, you do not immediately see him but “feel” him as every single cell in your body responds to his familiar vibration. The air is suddenly thick and hazy with an almost tangible frenetic energy. You glance over and immediately catch his eye.

Time stands still.

The vision of him standing at the doorway of the small room – illuminated as if standing under a divine spotlight – almost makes you gasp. Your breath catches in your throat and a tingle shoots through your body like liquid fire. You have never met this person before yet you experience what can only be described as a feeling of being discovered, found out – like you have been hidden from him and here he is now, having found you. It is unexpected – and with it, blurry memories of distant times and places suddenly flood your consciousness.

The team leader leads him into the room and introduces him to a couple of the team members who are not in the middle of interviews. All this time, his eyes are fixated on you. You seem to recognize him from somewhere. He walks over and pulls a chair right next to you. Turning his body to face you completely, he just sits there, gazing at you like a blind man staring at the sun.

As you carry on with your interview, you cannot help but stare back into his blue eyes, seeing so deep into them you swear you’re catching glimpses of his soul. Feeling both exposed and fully seen for the first time, you feel him peer deep into you. You cannot help but smile back at him. You feel an instant spark – not of physical chemistry – but a spark that ignites the heart and soul.

When your interview finally ends, his first words are “You have the most beautiful accent I have ever heard”. He wants to know everything about you. As you talk, you find him staring at your curiously. “It’s like there’s this light around you, like you are glowing,” he says. There is something strangely familiar and comforting about him; the sound of his voice, his eyes, his energy. Just like you, he can easily switch between fluent English and French. He tells you he is originally from North Africa and for the past decade has lived between London and New York. You also have a close connection with these cities. He is here to work on a project in Arabic. At almost 32 years old, he is 7 years older than you.

That night, you chat away like excited children and the team leader has to repeatedly ask you to keep it down. You simply cannot contain your unadulterated happiness at meeting each other. Even in the silence, bright bursts of sunlight spark between your smiling eyes. You are struck by the deep knowing that whatever happens from now on, just to have him in your life is enough. Just to know he exists is enough. The emptiness you had felt of something missing in your life is suddenly gone. He is here – and you can never lose him again.

You catch the 9:30pm train back into Paris with the rest of the team. For the entire train ride, you only have eyes for each other. When he asks you what your favourite things in life are, you both exclaim as if from the same mouth “Travelling, languages and writing!”. He gasps comically, yet he is far from being shocked or even surprised – in fact, he had totally expected it. It is surreal how alike you are! When the train pulls into Gare de Lyon, his stop, he deliberately misses it, just to be able to spend a few more moments with you. As you alight at the following station, you both have another two trains to catch. Unable to walk away, you continue your conversation in the middle of world’s busiest underground station.

Although you are aware of people swaying past you from all directions, all you can see is each other. There is flirtation, deep soul revealing conversations, laughter. He asks you out for a drink but it is getting late and you worry about your boyfriend’s reaction. “I really must go now”, you say – yet three hours and twenty I really must go now’s later, you have barely moved an inch. Thousands of people have passed you by. It is already past midnight and you know you have to go if you wish to catch the last train home. Back at home, you lie awake all night thinking about him, your body bursting with energy. You cannot wait to see him again and somehow you know the feeling is mutual.

The next day at work you try to tell friends about what happened but you find yourself lacking the words to adequately describe him or the events of the night before. You can’t even say his name out loud; a shiver of energy runs through your body whenever you try. Just thinking about his name does strange things to you. Your friends think it’s amusing and suggest you might be slightly mad and remind you that you have a boyfriend. “It’s not like that”, you tell them. “There’s nothing like that going on!” – yet you leave work early to buy your first mobile phone, just so he can call you.


As promised, you see each other at work the following day. He has not slept a wink either. When he confesses he is unable to stop thinking about you, your entire body vibrates in response. He is having a hard time pinpointing quite what it is that is causing him to feel this irresistible pull to you. “Maybe it’s because you live in abundance”, he says, and this sticks in your mind because it’s such an unusual thing to say. Leaving each other is even harder that night – after hours chatting at the station you reluctantly go your separate ways. Little do you know, immediately after leaving you he feels as if his own being is being torn apart. He leaves his train in order to call you. You had only just given him your number. Since you are in the underground, his call does not reach you and goes through to voicemail instead.

Twenty minutes later arriving at your home station you notice someone has left you a voicemail. Your chest swells hearing his voice.

Hey… Jonna”, he starts. The way he says your name sends a shiver up your spine. “I cannot go home. I want to see you”. The emotion in his words is palpable. “I need to be with you. We’ll do whatever you want. Have a drink, walk, whatever. It doesn’t matter as long as I am with you. Please come to George V on the Champs Elysees. I will be here waiting“.

You turn around immediately and run back into the underground. You MUST go to him. Is this even REAL? It is nearing 1:00am, and the last train is only minutes away.

As you come up onto the Champs-Elysées, you immediately spot him standing at the top of the escalator, beaming. It is a sight you will never forget. In your mind’s eye he shines brightly like a thousand suns. You spend the entire night walking through the city that never sleeps, past the brightly lit monuments and bridges, staring into the starlit Seine-river, sharing stories of your childhood, dreams, hopes and fears… It feels like a fairy tale and there are no words to describe how much being with him feels like home to you. All the usual pressure that comes with meeting a person of the opposite sex is gone; all that guessing, trying to impress them, trying not to make a fool of yourself; there is none of it – for the first time in your life you feel completely yourself.

You both feel an urge to tell each other everything. You trust him because you instinctively know you have the same thoughts. He tells you about his travels, his past, the pain of losing his father, how he never felt unconditional love from his mother – in turn, you tell him about growing up in Finland, your parent’s recent divorce, your life-long yearning to be somewhere you couldn’t quite grasp – a yearning he had felt too, growing up in his native Algeria.

You talk about your interests which seem to mirror each other almost perfectly. Even your job history has many parallels: you both have a background in market research and translations. When he tells you he considers himself a “citizen of the world”, you can hardly believe it. At the age of fifteen, you remember writing an article for the local newspaper where you proudly stated “I am a citizen of the world”. It is how you have always felt.

That morning, just before sunrise, he walks you to near your little basement flat just a stone’s throw from Pont Alexandre III bridge. He behaves like the perfect gentleman. You feel a kinship and a connection with him which is different from any other relationship you have encountered before. Your togetherness is effortless, child-like, joyful – you have never felt such lightness in just being yourself. It does not even occur to you that there might be more to this. Surely he is completely out of your league anyway?

The following day he asks you to meet him at Boulainvilliers station. He wants to take you to a café he absolutely loves, a “hidden gem”, as he describes it. You can hardly believe it when he takes you to your favorite café in Paris, famous for its flower-filled terrace and the dozen cats that live there. You both love cats, of course. Sat out on the terrace, you spend the entire evening leaning over the table towards each other, completing each other’s sentences and simultaneously saying the same things. Captivated, he hangs onto your every word. You cannot help but notice the electric current of energy flowing between you – an image of two opposing charges pushing and pulling at each other flashes through your mind. “It’s like we are polar opposites”, he exclaims, that same second.

You discover further parallels and synchronicities despite coming from different social, cultural and religious surroundings. You notice how similar your thoughts, life experiences and expressions are – as are your beliefs, values and talents. You have the same creative drive, aspirations and dreams; you are asking yourselves the same questions. There are also complementary differences – he is an extrovert, you an introvert; he is a speaker, you’re a writer etc.

You start to feel like this is not just a chance or coincidence but that there is a divine hand at play. As the night goes on and as you discover more about him you realize you are in fact learning more about yourself. As you look into his eyes, you keep seeing yourself, as if looking into a bright mirror. You recognize in him a male version of yourself. He feels it too and tells you, his spellbound eyes shining brightly: “Jonna, you are my mirror image!” He speaks passionately about your eternal connection, about a wall coming down, veils being lifted and so on. You have trouble following it all – you are newly awakened and you lack the awareness and the vocabulary to describe the experience. Besides, you are lost in his beautiful blue eyes.

It is that night that he first tells you he has recently separated from his wife of almost ten years; a British-American woman 20+ years his senior whom he had married following a whirlwind romance in his early twenties. They shared many common interests, such as a love for photography and travel, and had lived between London and New York with extensive travel around the globe. Unfortunately, outside of their numerous vacations, they no longer got along.

He asks if you have a boyfriend. You hesitate for a second, then tell him you have recently separated. It isn’t exactly true, although you have tried to leave more times than you care to remember. “Things are still a little unresolved”, you say. He doesn’t seem to mind. Sitting there realising the energetic suppression that you have been living under, you are more adamant than ever that you will break it off with your boyfriend at the first opportunity. Even though you barely know this man, something about your togetherness immediately exposes the lie you’ve been living. You realize these two relationships do not even exist on the same plane. Strangely, you cannot ever imagine touching your boyfriend or another man again.

As the night falls, he invites you back to his place. “It’s way too early, you hardly know this man!” your rational mind screams. As you say your goodbyes on the train platform and just as the alarm for the closing doors sounds, he cups your face in his hands and presses a warm kiss onto your forehead. You blindly feel around for a seat as the doors slam shut and the train jolts into motion. Your head is spinning. Sat there with a huge smile on your face, you are puzzled. You recognize the sexual subliminal undercurrent between you two but it is not the main thing – the deep bond or friendship is. Tall, extrovert, with a nervous energy, he is far from being your physical “type” – and you are far from being his. What does this mean? All you know is you want to have him in your life, always. That night, as you step through the front door, the phone rings. He is missing you already. You talk into the early hours of the morning until it is time for you to get ready for work.

The following night, in his studio hidden away in a leafy Parisian courtyard, you are amazed to discover that even his reading habits match yours – there in a corner is a bookcase with contents identical to yours. After fixing you some dinner, he joins you on the sofa with a photo album in hand, resting his leg casually against yours. The photos cover his entire life until now; his childhood, his family back in Algeria, his travels around the world, his marriage. In one picture he poses happily with his wife on a Carnival cruise ship. “That was on our honeymoon”, he smiles. In another picture, they hug and smile on top of Machu Picchu. “That’s us in Peru, not so long ago. I truly thought I would spend the rest of my life with her”. The way he speaks about her so lovingly makes you wonder why he ever left her. It isn’t until much later that you learn that it was his spiritual awakening, just prior to your meeting, which was at least partly to blame for his arrival in Paris. You wonder why Paris of all places.


After a while, the combination of his leg resting against yours, his closeness and his softly spoken voice make it increasingly difficult for you to concentrate. You just want to hold him. He is right there with you – he closes the album and lets it fall on the floor. His arms circle you and for the longest moment you just hold each other. Gazing into his eyes, you dive in deep, seeing galaxies speed past a dizzying speeds, floating in the timeless space, experiencing what you can only describe as “God”, or the most powerful, sublime and infinitely loving force, looking at him through your eyes. As the mirror of his soul reflects this God consciousness back to you, you see yourself as if God is looking back at God itself. The amount of love you feel leaves you forever changed.

When your lips finally touch the sense of rightness is such that a powerful “YES” rises from deep within you. He shows you that every other kiss you’ve had in your life has been wrong. His face has the slightest bit of stubble and it rubs your skin but you don’t care. You don’t care at all. Every inch of your body dissolves into his, so much so that you wonder whether you’ll ever be able to find your way back into it. When you come up for air four hours later, you both let out an immediate and simultaneous “FINALLY!”, before collapsing back into the sofa laughing. How amazing to finally find someone who knows how to hold, kiss & caress! “I have waited FOREVER to do that”, he sighs and you kiss some more. Neither one of you had felt any time pass at all.

The next day returning from work you find your boyfriend waiting for you outside your apartment. Feeling empowered and supported from within like never before, you tell him it’s over, once and for all. Initially he seems to take the news well, agreeing that your separation has been a long time coming, however only days later, he attacks you in a jealous rage outside your home. You are simply too ashamed to tell your friend. You want to believe that a new life is beginning for you and are determined not to let the ghosts of your past destroy it.


Being with your friend is energizing, like being charged by the Universe. You can hardly concentrate at work and he occupies your every thought 24/7. At the same time, you have never experienced such an explosion of creative energy within you. You barely sleep or eat – and you don’t need to. Over the next few weeks you lose a lot of weight– you are glowing, with a permanent smile on your face. Shivers of energy run through your body at the slightest thought of him. Just his name sends your atoms into a frenzy! People around you cannot help but notice the magnetic energy of your togetherness and immediately assume you’re a couple. Neither one of you can figure out what it is exactly that makes you so attracted to each other. Just being around each other is exhilarating. You develop a terrible stubble rash on your face from all the kissing.

It is only a matter of days before you both give into the magnetic pull to merge together – not only in mind, heart and soul, but in body. Taking that step feels so natural. You have never experienced such intimacy with anyone. So different, this is not about the physical sensations or human senses but about the joining of two bodies on all levels – spiritual, mental, emotional, physical. You both agree this act of merging feels both primal and sacred; you truly are making love. There is a sense of coming together of polarities and the recognition of their already present unity; an exchange of DNA, the creation of something new; at once sexual, psychological and spiritual, earthly and transcendent, individual and universal, masculine and feminine. He later describes your love-making as a “different kind of physical communication and nourishment”.

There are times he climaxes so powerfully that you fear he might hurt himself. Huge amounts of energy are being released. Once or twice his orgasms leave him unable to walk, or articulate anything that would make sense. He speaks incoherently about galaxies speeding past him, floating in the clouds, about having died and gone to Heaven. This may well be what he tells all the women in his life (and you suspect there have been many) but never in your life have you seen a man climax like that. “Only you do that to me”, he later confides.


Afterwards, your naked bodies intimately entwined, he takes your hand and superposes it on his. “It’s the perfect fit,” he says, and kisses you tenderly. “YOU are perfect to me.” Nestled there in the nook of his arm, you smooth the damp hair away from his temples. You love him like a lover, a mother, a sister, a friend, a teacher, a student, all at once. You have never known such unconditional love before. Truly, only God can love him more.

You…,” he says, his voice cracking with emotion. He pauses, before continuing: “You make me feel like a virgin.” There is shyness and vulnerability behind his brave and gregarious mask. ”It’s hard to explain but every time with you feels like the first time. I have never experienced it before. I have always pursued women, like a hunter. That’s what we men are taught to do. Only, once the hunt is over, I have often felt empty, even used.”

He pauses.

With you it’s completely the opposite. I feel empowered but also helpless when I am in your arms”.

He clears his throat to try and regain control of his emotions, then looks at you half puzzled, half amused, his eyes searching your gaze. “It’s like you’ve put a spell on me…”

You are unsure whether that’s a statement or a question.

Like I can’t hide anything from you”, he continues, “Like you see straight into my soul.”

You don’t disagree. You do.

You spend the next couple of months joined at the hip. You bring out the best in each other – he truly wants you to become the best version of you. You happily introduce each other to members of your respective families over the telephone without thinking too much of it and plan to travel back to your home country together later in the summer. You introduce him to all your closest friends. You lose friends too – not everyone understands how you can leave your boyfriend and move on so fast. Very few people know about the hell your life has been these past few years.

He is your shelter from this world – for the first time you feel like someone truly understands you, gets you and accepts you for who you are. Being with him makes your brain quiet; you do not need to invent anything. He is by far the most wonderful, awe-inspiring soul you have ever met – and he seems to feel the same way about you.

You spend your nights talking about everything between Heaven and Earth. You both appreciate the value of clear and open communication and even though you explain yourselves out of habit of doing so with others, inside you both know you don’t have to. Your brains are in sync; you have the same views and ways of thinking. You know he would never judge you. He tells you he has recently had a spiritual awakening. He is into horoscopes and seems to know everything about your Gemini-Pisces compatibility. He speaks with great passion about his plans for you to better the world together – to “build a bridge between cultures and religions, between East and West”. He speaks about travelling together, opening a B&B together in a warmer climate, writing and publishing together.

You want all those things but wonder how, from your short time together, he can so enthusiastically “see” these things. You find it hard to see that far into the future anyway due to the volatile situation with your ex-boyfriend. Only recently, he kicked your door down trying to get to you. Through your soul bearing conversations it becomes clear his situation with his estranged wife is just as unresolved. He tells you of his sense of duty towards her and how difficult this has made leaving her. He has been dealing with emotional blackmail from her, fearing she will hurt herself, and feels horrible about causing her so much pain. At the same time your ex is still refusing to leave you alone, alternating between extreme anger and depression. You fear he will kill you or himself – or both. He has started to call your workplace, causing disruption. Naively, you hope there is an amicable conclusion to your time together. There never will be. One night your friend turns to you and says “Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could both had magic wands to resolve each other’s problems?”

Unfortunately the situation with your ex-partners only gets worse. Between you fearing your ex’s reaction and his wife announcing her visit, your time together is now under threat. He tells you you were only ever meant to be friends and that everything else has been a “bonus.” You know this is how you lose him. The Universe steps in and your daytime job assigns you to a temporary project working at the head office, at a location unknown to your ex. When you tell your friend about the project he immediately suggests you should work together. The stars align to help you: your boss – usually the most unhelpful, uncaring woman – instantly agrees, without ever meeting him. Somehow, even if this buys you more time, you know this time is borrowed.

You spend several weeks holed up in an office together, working as a team of two. You are so in sync you barely need words. With his wife is town, you no longer spend your nights together however most evenings, you ride home on the bus which follows the circular route around Paris. Although it is painstakingly slow, it is often the best moment of your day, sitting there with your legs rubbing, in silence, feeling recharged and comforted by each other’s presence. Here in the crowded commuter bus, you can still be together. As you look at him with the kind of certainty that only comes once in a lifetime, you know this Love will last forever.


It is years later now but the memory of that summer is still as magical as ever. He is still your favourite place to go when your mind searches for peace.

No matter that it ended in tears, the love between your souls still remains. You feel it within you each passing day.

Then why is it still so difficult?

He is a stranger, he is nothing, your wounded ego tells you.

He is home, he is everything, your soul responds.

People often ask whether there is any mention of twin flames in the Bible or the Qur’an –however since this term is a fairly recent one associated with a “new age” concept, one simply cannot expect to find it in books written hundreds or even thousands of years ago. Yet while some try to use its absence as proof that there is no such thing as “twin flames”, these eternal lovers – also known as counterparts, or polar opposites, have actually been around since the beginning of time.

As I share some of my insights into the Quranic and Biblical scriptures surrounding the ideas of marriage, true love and the twin flame journey, I understand that this may be a controversial subject for some. My purpose is not to rewrite either one of these Holy Books or to go all gung ho with the interpretations, but – should this subject be relevant to you – ask you to examine your own heart and what resonates. As you too study these scriptures I invite you to truly allow yourself to feel the depth of love that God intended for you – and to come to your own conclusions.

Both the Bible and the Qur’an give a description of what marriage between counterparts is like. Many understand this as meaning the marriage to the husband or wife that we have ourselves chosen and see the descriptions in these Holy books as something to strive for, however I believe this is simply because so few of us have experienced or known a true marriage. You see; true marriage as the Bible and the Qur’an describe it, is made and sustained by God. As such, it could never be just the man-made, watered-down, sign-on-the-dotted-line dissolvable contract that binds people together while it lasts, but an alchemical UNION of two souls which God has created for each other; as an act of worship, as a means to get closer to God and to fulfil the divine mandate – and ultimately, as the final step before the return home.

Adam and Eve were the original counterparts. Both the Bible and Qur’an tell their story, however the accounts and the detail vary slightly. God put Adam to sleep while he took his rib and created Eve – something which, although not confirmed in the Qur’an, is in fact supported by a Hadith in Bukhari. The reason God put Adam to sleep is so that Adam, on first seeing Eve, would recognise her as being a part of him but also as a gift from God, since, being asleep, he had no role in creating her. So when he in Genesis 2:23 exlaims: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh,” he does this out of recognition of himself in her, even without knowing she came from him.

According to the Qur’an, after the incident in the Garden, God tells Adam and Eve to leave Paradise and go to live on earth. On earth, they no longer remember who they are and become separated from each other for many years. Eventually, after years of searching they pray a sincere prayer of repentance and are reunited with God and each other. Sound familiar? I love Adam’s and Eve’s reunion story because it shows the importance and power of heart-felt prayer because if both counterparts sincerely call upon God to grant their Union then there is no reason why in divine timing it shouldn’t. It also teaches us about patience, sabr.

Many go through a similar journey here on earth. We suffer from spiritual amnesia when we come here, and go through decades of growth to get to a semblance of serenity and self-awareness. Yet inside we still feel something missing. Occasionally we turn to God and seek a deeper understanding, a purpose, a reason for the pain. So how does this relate to twin flames? If we have been blessed to meet ours in this lifetime, one of the significant touchstones on the path is the realization God has sent them to us to challenge us and to awaken us so that you both could be guided back to wholeness, and to God. The way the twin flame does it is by pushing us on a deep journey of self-discovery and self-realization – an essential step for every God-created union.

Both the Bible and Qur’an agree that the way for us to know God and to truly understand His word is to first come to an accurate & full knowledge of ourselves. This is relevant to the twin flame journey in so many ways because the often the connection to the twin mimics closely/reflects the connection to the Self. If a man wants to see himself, he looks in the mirror, right? – and there is no truer reflection than your counterpart twin.

The Bible tells man to “Know Thyself” (Romans 12:3-8), whereas Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) is reported to have said “Whoever knows himself knows God”. It makes perfect sense, after all “God created mankind in his own image” (Gen 1:27) and “I breathed into him of My spirit” (Qur’an 38:72). Furthermore, the Qur’an tells us that it is reflecting and examining our own self which guides us to the eternal, infinite Source that is free of need and want; unlimited in knowledge, inspiration and power – and abundant in love, mercy and acceptance. God is within us, closer than our jugular vein (Qur’an, 50:16), and when we come to know ourselves, we can align with His will already planted in our heart.


So what do the Bible and the Qur’an say about counterparts? Firstly, both books tell us that God created everything in pairs, such as “And of everything We have created pairs: That ye may receive Instruction” (Qur’an 51:49) and …“male and female he created them” (Gen. 1:27). I particularly like the Quranic text which seems to indicate that us being able to receive “instruction” (i.e. guidance) is somehow linked to our pair.

The Prophet of Islam (pbuh) said, “Women are the twin halves of men”. Your pair, your counterpart, is the person with whom you share the same essence and a “single nature and one self” (Sura al-Nisa 4:1). “It is He who created you from a single person, And made its mate of like nature in order that you might dwell with her in love….” (Qur’an 7:189). In the Qur’anic philosophy each person is a zawj, a half of a whole consisting of two matching, interlocking and interworking parts. What is true throughout creation also applies to the human marriage, i.e. when something is created as one part of a pair it is clearly incomplete without the other – as the Qur’an states, “He himself created the pair, male and female” (Qur’an 53:45), and sometimes several incarnations take place with the zawjs making near misses.  However when the zawjs come together they reveal concealed potentials within each other, potentials that were impossible to realize while they were apart.

Regarding the marriage between counterparts, the Qur’an states: “And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your hearts. Verily in that are signs for those who reflect.” [Qur’an 30:21). Notice how the Qur’an is basically saying; this is how you know, and invites you to reflect on the “signs”. One of the signs being that your mate was created from “among your Self”, i.e. they are like you. One thing is for sure: the stress and tension of an ill-fitting union are absent when one is bonded with the right person. There is no mention of mediocrity, emotional blackmail, co-dependency, being lost spiritually within the marriage and having to “work out differences” in what the Qur’an describes. Instead, God put love and mercy between the hearts of the counterparts, and they are a haven of tranquillity for each other. They are each other’s medicine. In fact, the Yasir Qahdi mentions that the successful marriage is not when you can live in peace with your wife, but when you can’t live in peace without her.

Having said this, the idea of a counterpart (twin flame) is somewhat controversial in Islam, since many associate the literal theory of the “other half” as only applying to Adam and Eve, not other souls. However as I understand there are ayahs in the Qur’an which leave this issue open to interpretation. The reason that the theory of a soul mate, or twin flame, is not widely accepted in Islam is that Islam teaches us to be realistic and truthful, and such “fantasies” may even be seen as a form of zina (fornication) with the mind. Instead, Islam teaches us that once you have selected a spouse according to the guidelines set by Islam (their religious and inner qualities), then you MAKE marriage work, and the blessings follow from thereon. Basically, a male and female can build up a good relationship but ONLY within the framework of a marriage. Anything else is haram, forbidden.

Basically, your spouse is your soulmate.

However, beyond the Islamic guidelines is the deeper truth found in the Qur’an which closely reflects that found in the Bible. It is the truth of connection, of Union: when God intends a man and woman for each other, they join together & become one. “They are no longer two but one flesh” (Matthew 19:6). That it is. They become “yoked together”, end of story. Being “one” with someone (or not) cannot be faked, denied or ignored permanently. No person, no event, no act, no decision can ever pull apart such a Union, whether these two get to live their lives as husband or wife or not; whether they are a part of each other’s lives or not. “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man put asunder.” (Matthew 19:6). True counterparts, through the merging of their energetic fields, know that they carry a part of the other so tightly entwined within their being that it would be impossible to untangle one from the other, or God from what is between them. They are bound together for eternity; their spiritual growth always a reflection of the other.

In the Islamic tradition, marriage is half of a person’s “deen” (i.e. their “duty” to God). Many people understand this as meaning that the act of marrying completes half their duty towards God – like they can finally sigh a sigh of relief, phew, that’s that done, right? No, wrong. Just the simple act of marrying, if done for the wrong reasons, is unlikely to get you any closer to God. After all, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) made it very clear it is always the spirit behind the act which counts more than the act itself. This is how important it is to find the right marriage partner. Yet two people who have come to know God and who call on their Beloved and find their reflection and echo in the other are still a rare occurrence in this world.

According to Islam, Allah has already written the provision for every soul on this earth, including whom we marry. Yet marriage is a decision that many people take without an accurate knowledge of God or themselves. For the majority of us, our marriages are unions of convenience which stagnate and in fact hold us back, be it after 2, 7, 10 or 30 years together. Oftentimes we exercise our free will too hastily and enter into relationships to fill a lack inside; for the other person to complete us, to aid our personal growth, to make us happy, to start a family, to support us financially etc. We prioritise chemistry over compatibility and physical attraction over spiritual resonance. We choose our partners based on their looks, their financial status or family background, their ability to bear children, their intelligence and so on. You get the gist. Your true counterpart is rarely your chosen wife or husband since these arrangements are made by you and represent a physical union.


So, what if you are already married but find yourself being pulled by God’s guidance towards someone other than your spouse? This pull has nothing to do with being or planning to be unfaithful. It is not uncommon for this to happen, and when it does, many find themselves challenged to the core by the fact that God’s undeniable call to worship/service could come through loving another person, especially if one does not happen to be married to that person. Society tells us that the person we marry is the one we are supposed to love exclusively – and even if through our spiritual and emotional growth we find God and realize we are stuck in an incompatible marriage, we still persist with it because this is what our societal, religious and cultural conditioning tells us to do. It takes a lot of courage to let ourselves feel – let alone pursue – the deep love that our true counterpart awakens within us and to forsake what we have been taught to perceive as morally wrong and contrary to God’s command in favour of what our heart tells us is right, divine and true.

Let’s be honest though, how many of us have sincerely selected our partners based their ability to remind us of God and his Love? Are our husbands and wives the beacons of light God intended them to be, pointing us towards the eternal life? The thing is, real love brings us closer to God. It is an act of worship which connects us with ourselves and others. Since it comes from Spirit; it also creates a living connection to God and to a greater purpose. It is unconditional love which exists by its own right, through a flow of REAL love connecting the two lovers no matter that the circumstances or distance between them. “Beloved, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God” (1 John 4:7). Such love could never be wrong.

The Qur’an speaks about God making the hearts of believers familiar (Qur’an 8:63). It is also said that it is the light of Oneness that yields spiritual love and familiarity in the heart; for love is the shadow of Oneness, familiarity the shadow of love, and balance the shadow of familiarity. Since God is ONE, the closer the heart is to Oneness, the stronger the power of love is within it. Surely this explains why certain connections are strong, and even at times overwhelming. They help bring us back to the wholeness that we are by strengthening our love towards our self and others! Their mere presence acts as a purifying fire where everything other than love is burned away by the closeness to God.

Now I am not an advocate of anyone leaving their spouse at first sight of such phenomena, and I certainly do not condone extramarital affairs. But beyond all the questions and moral dilemmas that arise, is the truth of what Real Love is: it is a movement towards unity, towards oneness. It is a home-bound move. Therefore, we have to ask ourselves: is love putting the blinders on and persisting in an incompatible marriage; or is it trusting the small voice inside our hearts which tells us to follow the call home to God, no matter what this may look like on the outside?

There is another way to look at this dilemma. Let’s say that you are married and meet your beloved. You know it is God calling you to this person but you do not feel you should leave your marriage; after all, your partner hasn’t done anything wrong – or maybe they have – but either way you don’t want to hurt them. Perhaps you hide away from this other person, hoping she and the feelings for her will go away in time – or maybe you engage in an illicit affair with them behind your marriage partners back; somehow thinking that this is a better solution than leaving. However, what if in such a situation, you saw your first loyalty as being towards God? What if in examining your heart you recognized that you had married this person before you had come to know and trust God? Surely then, you can admit that this marriage is not by divine mandate but by human choice and could begin to take the steps necessary to realign yourself with God’s will.

Here comes the truth: You do not trust God. You are fighting him! Realize that there is no such thing as free will. Not really. God’s will for you is your will and you fight it because you want it all on your terms. You do not choose who you love. God chooses for you – and he makes no mistakes.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
 in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight

(Proverbs 3:5-6)



In the Islamic tradition at least, there is no higher love between humans than the love which is for the sake of God; love that exists for the simple reason that the person we love brings us closer to God and points us in His direction. The Qur’an states that on the day of judgment, it is those who love each other for the sake of God – meeting for His sake and parting for His sake – that will find shade. Our main consideration in selecting our partner therefore should always be how much love they inspire in us and how close to God they bring us – after all it is by the amount of love in our hearts that we will be judged.

God tells us to “love one another as I have loved you” (John 15:12). Furthermore, both Holy books speak about the importance of loving others like we love ourselves. “None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself” (Hadith 13) and “Love your neighbour as yourself” (Mark 12:31). It is worth considering that these verses cover a deeper meaning, which is that perhaps we have not known God, or true love, until we have EXPERIENCED what it is to truly love another like we love ourselves, like twin flames do; where we hurt when they hurt, where their happiness is also ours, where nothing can be hidden or denied, and where we know without a doubt that at our core we are the same. This is Love. This is Union. This is to know God.

In the gospel of Thomas, which did not make the final cut of the Bible having been judged as too “out there”, Jesus gives us a glimpse into what the “yoking together” of a man and a woman truly is, as well as what the reward for such love is. “When you make the two one, and when you make the inside like the outside and the outside like the inside, and the above like the below, and when you make the male and the female one and the same, so that the male not be male nor the female female; and when you fashion eyes in the place of an eye, and a hand in place of a hand, and a foot in place of a foot, and a likeness in place of a likeness; then will you enter [the Kingdom]” (Thomas 24).

That’s right. Union of “equally yoked” souls leads to God’s Kingdom.

As for marriages of convenience, where do they lead us? The Bible tells us not to be “unequally yoked together with unbelievers” (Corinthians 6:14) for “What fellowship can light have with darkness?”.  If true belief comes from learning to love the other as we love ourselves like the Prophet of Islam stated in the hadith previously quoted, then the warning the Bible gives us is not to bind ourselves to anyone who does not have such love. Are we with someone who loves us unconditionally? Someone who sees eternity in our eyes, and feels the closeness of God just at the thought of us? Furthermore, 1 Corinthians 7:16 says “How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?”. Just because someone is your husband or wife through an earthly bond of marriage does not mean that you will be “saved” together. This is why it’s important to trust God for the best possible plan for our lives, even if it means our lives will go in a new direction.

Since “God created everything in pairs”, it is God that is the point of reference for the counterparts. “He has set up the balance…” of all things, so the counterparts should only look for Him to set all things in the right equilibrium. This means, no rushed actions or jumps from one relationship to another in the hopes of catching the elusive twin flame; not without first doing the work to get to know our Self, learning surrender, becoming humble and establishing your personal relationship with God. Your priority has to be to first set things right with God, so that he can bring about the balance within your lives together if such is His will.

Surrender is so crucial because through it, we stop trying to play God. We release the illusion that we are in control here. God loves us and wants amazing things for us, but we need to know when we are standing in His way. More than anything, surrender implies the end of resistance. It requires total acceptance since we cannot surrender something that we deny, or something that we won’t face. Rather we surrender when we no longer blame, control, deny, hide, calibrate, compromise, expect, push or pull, ignore, avoid, force, wait or manipulate. Surrender asks us to die to ourselves; to release who we think we are and to become nothing once more so that God can become everything in us. God needs space in us to work through us and he can only do this once we finally just allow whatever is to be.

With God, everything plays out perfectly as He planned it.

Ultimately what I am trying to say here is that the importance of marriage as a social contract should not never override its original purpose of true partnership, a mingling of the spirit, heart and soul of a male and a female of like nature, created together; fulfilling the divine mandate for their lives. Beyond the societal rules and restrictions that govern marriage and divorce there is simple truth: what good is a marriage, no matter how long or fruitful, if we do not see eternity in the eyes of our spouse? True love lasts forever – beyond time and space; beyond this lifetime into the eternal life; into Paradise, into Jannah. True counterparts care about each other’s salvation and know that the other was sent by God to help guide them home.

For me, this whole existence – and certainly this journey – would be pointless if I did not believe with ALL MY HEART that God sent him to me – and vice versa – to bring us into closeness with Him and each other. He is the person who, by just being himself, brings me home. Just his presence – energetic, spiritual or physical, has helped make me a better person; and the love that I have come to know through him has made me a believer. I hold fast to the promise of an eternal life (”You will be with those you love”- Prophet Muhammad [pbuh]) and I know it will be worth every moment spent apart. All I know is that my beloved brings me closer to God. No one else can do it for me.  And this is how I know he is “The One.”

Does his marriage to another change this truth? No, not at all. First of all, meeting our beloved does not have to destroy any marriages. We can also act as a positive, empowering force in each other’s lives without engaging in a sexual relationship. An Islamic fatwa states that if we feel love for a member of the opposite sex, then the emotion itself is not the subject of questioning on the Day of Judgment. If you feel you love someone, if you have a special affinity towards them, then you cannot control your feeling. Such love is not bad. Love has to do with the heart, and it may appear in a person’s heart for reasons known or unknown. Feel free to embrace it. However, when we take that love and give expression to our feelings in actions permissible only within the bond of marriage then our action becomes forbidden.

To truly love someone means to have reverence and respect for that person. If the object of our love is married to someone else and chooses to stay in the marriage, then we should accept and embrace such a marriage as an extension of our love for them. This is because true counterparts know the value of the other as a spiritual person, and it is from reverence that they source the willingness to grant the beloved the spiritual space needed to freely travel his/her own path. It is for this reason that true counterparts never make any demands on each other. Their connection is unique and irreplaceable, whether they are together or not – and no amount of sex, marriage vows, babies, or years together can ever bring forth such a connection with another. It either exists organically from the offset – or it doesn’t. True counterparts are always within each other, a part of each other in a way that could never render them insecure towards each other. It just is what it is. Even if one of them is married to another, they will always be reminded of their eternal promise to each other; and their Union, whether here on earth or in the Heavens, is always only a matter of time. “Be completely humble and gentle; Be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the spirit through the bond of peace.” Ephesians 4:2-3

In my heart, I know that God brings counterparts together for so much more than just a life together as a couple here on earth. I know that if mine is showing up in my life – and I in his – it means that I am being invited to step deeper into God’s love and into spiritual service, to step off the wheel of incarnation and to go home. My beloved brings me close to God. Nothing or no one can ever change this truth. That’s why when he told me, I think God sent you to me & vice versa, to challenge us, to expand us and guide us to his path, to his truth, to our eternal life & salvation, to peace and serenity”, this alone means more to me than any other promise of earthly marriage or life. It tells me that he is headed home – and I will be there to welcome him with open arms; whether it be in this realm, or the next.




Dear Readers, Friends, Beautiful Souls,

I am sorry for my long absence – I never intended to stay away so long!

THANK YOU sincerely for all your messages and emails asking me whether I will publish something again soon. To cut a very long story short, I was guided to take a few months out to process the growth and lessons of the past two years since my re connection with my beloved and my separation from my husband. As some of you may know, in the last 18 months I got close to my beloved again through long, deep late night chats – our first ones for a decade. Even though he seemed cautious, probably for fear of protecting his marriage and perhaps his heart, he was marvelling at the connection and feeling the pull too, telling me he was sure it was God’s guidance drawing us to each other.

Our chats were, as always, deeply spiritual, eye-opening, reassuring and flirtatious. Just his presence in my life helped me take the steps necessary to initiate the separation from my husband and to withstand the turmoil that followed. He also turned to me for support, for a listening ear – and I could not have been more grateful. I truly do know – or at least understand – him, his soul and spirit, like I know myself. As for the man who he portrays in this life; this persona that he has created… Sometimes that man drives me mad and I wish I didn’t see through him so easily. I find it so hard to get him to pinpoint exactly what he thinks, feels and experiences (funnily, he blamed me for this exact same thing) and when I do, he seems to contradict himself in the next moment. At his worst he is illogical, inconsiderate, aloof … I may be exaggerating a little there but you get what I mean right? I have millions of questions I would love to ask him, face to face, without the weight of expectations, or consequences – and to be honest, until this spring I thought we were getting there.

Unfortunately he has been silent again for the past five months or so; pretty much from the time I stopped writing. It’s no accident that those two things coincided. Only a few weeks earlier our worldly selves had been planning a weekend together at his house, with the purpose of having a long, uninterrupted heart to heart and hopefully some fun. He seemed to be genuinely looking forward to it – until he cancelled on me. It didn’t take long for him to start acting aloof and from thereon it all just unraveled. One night, I woke up with a jolt to a heated conversation in the spiritual realms, with him stating that we aren’t ready. It felt like being kicked off the bed without an explanation. Although I only caught the end of the conversation, it left me with an uneasy feeling. At first I didn’t think anything of it but he stopped contacting me pretty much from that day. My inspiration went too as I felt pushed away from him, the connection and my writing, to deal with “more practical matters” as well as more growth, insights, and unfortunately, hurt.

I know that this is very much how the healing process between us works– if the silences stretch to months it’s not because we intentionally want to ignore each other but because the times of connection and healing follow on from each other – and often the healing requires distance in order to make sense of things without the overwhelming presence of the other. Equally, when the invisible elastic cord between us snaps back, we find ourselves reconnecting again. So, here I am again, feeling the pull once more.

I wanted to share with you briefly what happened after our all-night chat (which I blogged about here) because this is pretty much where I left off. I have a lot to tell but I’ve gotta start somewhere. During the chat in question he had asked me about my spiritual visions/ experiences, telling me that if in deed they were true then I must be an angelic, a Goddess, in which case he would divorce his wife and be like me. He had reassured me that he was not being sarcastic but that he truly wanted me to think about it and enlighten him. I guess I knew better than to overwhelm him with the details of the deep spiritual and personal experiences I have shared with his higher self, however I simply could not help myself. As the inspiration in me grew, one thing led to another and I ended up proposing marriage to him.



No, seriously. I did.


I did.

Now this may seem like a big jump from asking him to accept me back into his life as a friend just six months prior but with the love that surrounded me in that moment it felt right. I hadn’t forgotten that my simple offer of friendship had ignited in him “overwhelming emotions and feelings” which kept him quiet for five months; a silence he had JUST broken…. But the Universe did not simply whisper at me to do it, it shouted – and answering his question just somehow lead me there. Of course I wasn’t talking about just marriage in the traditional, societal way – I was talking about marriage as an act of worship, as a means to get closer to God, as a means to fulfill the divine mandate – as the final step before the return home.

In my letter to him I quoted the Quran heavily since I resonate with its description of true love and a marriage partner the most; and I knew, being Muslim, he would be able to relate to it too. Therefore, in my next blog post which will follow shortly hereafter; rather than share the letter that I wrote him, I wanted to share some of my insights into the Quranic and Biblical quotes surrounding the ideas of marriage, true love and the twin flame journey. It’s a subject that interests me a lot and I would love your comments.

Love, Jonna




For me, there has been no greater joy on this path than the discovery of the Self in the other. No other human bond provides more latitude and depth for this than the Twin flame connection, since it is in the reflection of our truest self in the other that we find our Self, as well as the answers to our deepest existential questions.

Unfortunately, it is also here that we come to know our most devastating pain which does NOT come from seeing them love another, but from having to feel our way out of the proverbial darkness they often unexpectedly leave us in. It is the pain of not knowing “what” or “why”, brought on by their silences, denials, absences, avoidance and contradictions that kills us. It cuts so deep that to make it stop we often literally disconnect from a part of ourselves, just to be able to function. In the midst of it all, we wonder whether the love that we shared with them ever really existed, and if it did, was the reason we lost it because we never deserved it in the first place? The struggle to find our wholeness again, this time not through them but through a deep dive into our soul, is REAL. Yet the journey must be made because it is the only way for us to heal.

With this in mind, I inadvertently happened upon the movie Hancock, featuring Will Smith (John Hancock) and Charlize Theron (Mary Embrey). Having seen the trailer years ago I thought the film would be an action flick about a drunken, arrogant superhero with no past who slowly becomes a better man through his efforts to find himself and his purpose. To be honest, I wasn’t interested, however just as I was about to change the channel the following scene between the two main characters and Ray, Mary’s husband (Jason Bateman) came on. In the scene, Mary tries to explain her connection with Hancock to her husband.

Mary: “Whatever we are, we were built in twos, ok? We are drawn to each other. No matter how far I run, he’s ALWAYS there, he finds me. It’s physics”.

Ray: “What are you saying? Are you saying you two are fated to be together?”

Mary: “I’ve lived a very long time, Ray, and one thing I’ve learnt is: fate doesn’t decide everything. People get to choose”.

Hancock (to Mary, in disbelief): “And you CHOSE to let me think I was here alone?”

Mary: “I didn’t think you’d remember”.

Ray: “Great. So now what”?

Mary: (upset) “I didn’t plan for this”.

Curious, I switched onto channel +1 and watched the film from the beginning. It turns out that what the Hancock movie trailer completely fails to touch upon is the mystical, divine connection between the two main characters, which is effectively the big plot twist of the movie. Hancock is in fact not a comedy about a drunken superhero — but a drama about fate, love, sacrifice – and twin flames.

Hancock is the story of an immortal “superhero” who has lost his identity to alcohol and his memory to amnesia, having woken up 80 years prior in a Miami hospital unable to recall anything of his past or origin. His physical struggle is however only a reflection of his inner turmoil to physically find himself and his true identity, and to act on his purpose in life. I really liked the fact that even though this is a “twin flame movie”, this wasn’t the main focus of the film, but rather it was Hancock’s journey to find himself.

When Hancock rescues the well-meaning Ray from being killed by a train, Ray invites him to dinner at his house and it is here that Hancock meets Ray’s wife, Mary, and son, Aaron. Mary seems to have an instant dislike for Hancock and even warns her husband to not get involved with him. However Ray, always seeing the best in everyone, has a plan to improve Hancock’s public reputation and invites him on a journey of redemption; a journey which Hancock first rejects – only to return to it later.


The battle for the Truth

From the beginning, there is a subconscious knowing for Hancock that there is something going on with Mary that he can’t quite put his finger on, whether it is sexual chemistry or more. When Hancock and Mary are together, everything is stronger and actually a little “off”. Without really understanding the magnetism between them, Hancock finds himself pulled to Mary for answers to his deepest questions; almost as if by understanding their connection he will learn to understand and know himself. What Hancock cannot remember – and what Mary is keeping from him – is that they are twin flames. Having settled into a “normal” life in the matrix as Ray’s wife and mother to Aaron, she wants nothing more than to get Hancock out of her family’s life. Despite this, she cannot help but feel drawn to him.

When Hancock discovers that Mary also has superhuman powers and that he is not the only one of his kind, he demands answers. Initially, like any good twin flame “runner”, she avoids the subject, goes out of her way to tell Hancock what a good man Ray is and how happy she is with him and then eventually turns hostile and extremely protective of her family, warning him to stay away. She wants to keep her “normal” life intact. Although she seems unnecessarily cold towards Hancock, it is only because she knows that this connection, should she give into it, would not come without the complete destruction of life as she knows it; a life that she chose.

Many twin flames, just like Mary, know EXACTLY who the other is upon meeting. Whether they put the twin flame label on it or not, they will (at least subconsciously) know that they are meant to be with this person – no matter how long down the line they feel it will be. Often the arrival of the twin flame catches them by surprise, unprepared, not knowing how to deal with the calling and magnetic pull they’d rather ignore – yet knowing that one day they will have to give into it, because it is WHO THEY ARE.

The thing with this connection is that it engages us fully; and undeniably, when we choose to ignore it we somehow end up ignoring a part of ourselves; in Mary’s case her superpowers and immortality. Having rejected her destiny and purpose in exchange for a “normal” life, she now wants to keep Hancock’s relationship with her and his past a secret as well. This really struck a chord with me because where there is twin flame separation; there is often denial and secrecy, in one way or another. Isn’t this exactly what so many of us experience?  There are certainly moments on this journey where I feel like John Hancock, just figuring it all out, while there’s a chance that my twin flame is like Mary, having known who I am from day one.

In the film, Hancock must battle Mary to discover who he really is. In Hancock’s case, the more he pushes for answers, the more Mary resists, determined to keep Hancock from ruining her “happy life” but likewise determined to live her life apart from him so he can continue to be a superhero. Hiding the true nature of their connection she tells him they were “brother and sister”, but Hancock calls her bluff and threatens to tell Ray. Afraid that Hancock will ruin her marriage, Mary attempts to stop him, causing their argument to spiral out of proportion – exactly like true twin flames. I liked how the film showed the intensity of their disagreement; how exaggerated it all seemed. After the two battle each other to exhaustion Mary finally comes clean and reveals the truth to both Hancock and her husband.

Mary tells Hancock that they are divine, angelic beings created in pairs and drawn to each other across millennia. Unfortunately when the eternal lovers succumb to their fated attraction, their powers fade and they become mortal, which makes them susceptible to aging, injury and death. Mary and Hancock had survived together through numerous lifetimes, for more than three thousand years, until 80 years prior – having succumbed to their mutual desire to live human lives together – they were assaulted on the streets of Miami. With Hancock no longer able to recognize her, and struggling with a moral dilemma over her calling (and his), Mary leaves him in the hospital so he can live and carry on with his mission. Even though she is conflicted about her decision, she chooses separation for the greater benefit of all, including Hancock, who she knows will regain his strength with her away. In a way, she also wants to avoid her destiny by denying her powers.

While Mary eventually falls into a less destructive kind of love with Ray and lives a “normal” human life, Hancock, on the other hand, is lost. Unaware of who or what he is, yearning to be known fully – not least to himself, he wanders aimlessly, aching for a connection that he can’t quite articulate. He ends up following the path of many lost souls and drowns his existential malaise in alcohol while still attempting to rescue lives; often with disastrous results. It is only eighty years later on the other side of the country that he finds Mary once again but due to his amnesia does not recognize her.


Lesson One

The backstory tells us that Hancock and Mary purposely dismissed their calling as angelic beings sent to assist humankind and gave into the temptation of a human life together. In doing so, Hancock ended up not only forgetting his true nature but also opened himself up to the susceptibility of mortality. His amnesia therefore is no accident; it is the direct consequence of him rejecting his calling; indeed, Hancock lost himself because he tried to be something that he wasn’t; he tried to be human when he was really an immortal. It is here the first lesson this film offers: that it is only by accepting our God-given identity and mission that we gain knowledge of the Self, and can lead truly purposeful and happy lives. Everyone, just like Hancock, has the choice to accept or reject who they are called to be – and both these choices have consequences.

Personally, I believe that the call to be true to ourselves and to realize our purpose here MUST COME FIRST. After all, even Hancock found out the truth about himself and his connection with Mary only once he had fully surrendered to his mission with grace and dignity. As long as we are being true to ourselves, twin or no twin, we find the fulfilment we seek. By pursuing our true identity with perseverance, we achieve what we came here to do, whereas if we reject who we are by faux self-rationalization or self-loathing, we fail, living an aimless life, or come to a diseased demise.

Lesson Two

Another lesson in the film revolves around the possibility that sometimes we may have to temporarily sacrifice our heart’s desire for the greater good of all. Of course, at the level of our deepest being, the yearning for our counterpart never goes away: it is how we were created and how we find our way back home. However, what this film suggests is that we may not be meant to live a human existence with our Twin flame – but rather, it is eternity that is reserved for the deepest love of all; the sacred union of the soul. Could it be that perhaps to fulfil our mission on this planet we must temporarily sacrifice our desire to be with them? Is it that we are more valuable to the world if we are apart and focus our energy on healing the world and its people? This is a possibility every twin flame should at least consider. In the film it is only through the sacrifice of their desire to be together that Mary and Hancock can function and complete the mission they came here for.

I can certainly resonate with how loving our Twin flame does not always mean that we have to be with this person, right here, right now… In fact, we can love them with all that we are and still choose to be apart… Sometimes we must step back and allow them to live. Regardless, the love never lessens or goes away and if like Mary and Hancock we acknowledge and accept it as part our Self, we can never truly be without our Twin again. Then, the connection becomes a source of reassurance and comfort for us; and acts as an anchor which not only helps ground us deeper into this human experience, but that also helps us excel in our mission.

Although the film lacks the storybook happy-ever-after of a physical union that often comes with the romanticized idea of twin flames, I actually think that the ending is a realistic and positive one, portraying a serenity and acceptance of the choices that each of the film’s characters has made. It resonated with me that Hancock, now secure in the knowing of who he is, dedicates himself to his mission, content to keep his distance from Mary until the time comes for them to be together again. It resonated with me because this journey is never about the other, it’s about the Self – and no matter what the outer circumstances are it is always within our gift to grow, heal and serve. If truth be told, I think many of us could do with taking a page out of Hancock’s book and use the connection to propel ourselves deeper into our mission, rather than wasting away counting days to a reunion which – by the way – is only a matter of time.


Lesson Three

This leads me to the final and the most important lesson in this film; that union with our counterpart is a CHOICE. To borrow Mary’s words, people get the choose. Indeed, Mary and Hancock are not prisoners of their earthly circumstances, or of their divine calling. For them (and perhaps for us?) there is no right or wrong – just choices. According to the film backstory, all the other angelic beings had already paired up and died, i.e. returned to source. Mary and Hancock could also do so at any time but ONLY once they are ready to leave their human existence, i.e. their work here is done, or because they BOTH choose it – or because they are being called home.

This is a very thought-provoking idea in itself; to see Union as the final step before ascension; as the direct consequence of relinquishing our free will in favour of fate. In order for this to happen, we must be willing to let go of all our resistance, egoistic needs and the search for short term gains and turn our eyes towards Heaven, because in doing so, we gain so much more. We must surrender to the connection and allow it to naturally draw the counterparts together – which it will do, amnesia or not! Like Mary says; it’s physics!

What we did not get to see in the film is that once the Twins heed to the call to pair up and go home, they get to experience sacred union in the human form, before eventually having to “die”. This death is two-fold: first, they die to themselves through the annihilation of the ego, and then finally step off the wheel of reincarnation, away from this ”test bed” that is the Earth and transition through death beyond this physical form and dimension. Here they experience a rebirth, like the Phoenix rising from the ashes, and receive eternal life, true sacred union, and God’s pleasure. This is the reassurance that this film offers us beyond the physical and temporary circumstances of the main characters.

Indeed, we die here so that we may rise elsewhere and it is exactly what Twin flames who heed the call have to look forward to – sooner or later.


Although meeting our Twin flame ignites within us a stronger than ever yearning for “home”, for many of us the search for this elusive place started long before we ever heard the term “twin flames”. Perhaps you too recall moments where the distant memory of this place was triggered and you felt a deep longing, sadness or a desire to be somewhere you couldn’t consciously grasp or define? Perhaps like me, you too felt compelled to search for whatever it is that would fill that void and finally grant you inner peace?

My search for “home” started when I was a very small child…. Without knowing anything about reincarnation or even souls, I felt that for some reason I had ended up “in the wrong place”. This was not just about physical appearances (I was dark eyed/haired in a country of blue eyed and blonde haired people); I felt just as out of place inside. I was fascinated with other cultures and languages; particularly North Africa and the Arabic culture (incidentally, where my Twin grew up).

From the age of about 7, I became aware of the presence of another being within my energetic space. In my dreams he would become a real person and we would sit on top of sand dunes under the crescent moon and the stars, looking down on sleepy towns, sharing our hopes and aspirations. Our togetherness, albeit imaginary, became the foundation of many of my childhood games, drawings and stories about eternal lovers hidden behind the veil of illusion; overcoming obstacles to finally be together.

My experience is by no means unusual: many of us maintain a REAL, living connection to our Twin flame YEARS before meeting them. After all, twin flames share the ability to reach out to each other through the boundaries of time and space and many are able to pick up on things, such as their twin’s name, or perhaps where they live. Later in life, some find themselves guided to travel or even to move to a different State, country or continent in order to cross paths with their twin flame. I am one of those who took such a leap of faith after I, aged 17, had a profound experience visiting Paris where I wept with joy feeling myself closer than ever to this elusive “home” I so yearned to find. It was there that I knew I had to settle; and it is there that I met my twin some six years later.

While being in Paris gave me a temporary sense of peace, I spent most of the year leading up to our meeting obsessively travelling the world as far and as wide as I could – and so did my twin. The sense of imminent arrival of this something I had searched for; this something I had wanted so long made me feel restless to the core, until one day, BOOM – there he was. HOME. I knew there and then that it was him that I had been searching for all my life. My life was complete.. I was complete. Needless to say, all my feelings of not belonging that had plagued me since my earliest childhood simply vanished with the realisation that this person -this ONE person – existed and by some miracle not only saw me fully but also loved & accepted what he saw 100%.


Was it a coincidence that we met? Absolutely not… The thing about the journey home is; you never just happen upon it. You have been on this path long before you ever awakened, long before you ever heard the term “twin flames”. In fact, the yearning for home is deeply ingrained within us and being with our Twin satisfies only part of this hunger through the sense of physical, emotional and spiritual nourishment that only they can provide. Our Twin FEELS LIKE HOME to us because they help awaken the memory of the vibration and energy that we held whilst in our original state. The desire of the soul to reunite with itself will always remain, however the craving for the original feeling of oneness with Source, or God will follow sooner or later – and it is here that our journey home truly begins.

Many of us may catch glimpses of “home”in meditation or in dreams and the yearning to return there may at times feel stronger than our desire to continue living in this third dimensional reality. For me and my twin, the yearning for home was felt long before we ever laid eyes on each other. It was also the catalyst for our first reunion, as well as a reoccurring element in our connection ever since.

When I spoke to my Twin for the very first time after ending my three years of running, he asked me: “Where is your home, Jonna?” It was a very poignant question because we were both restless travellers at that time, living thousands of miles away from our places of birth. There was no denying that he was the closest to home that I had ever known, and if there was someone on this planet who I knew would take me there, it was him.

His question stayed with me that night and caused me to write my first ever inspired piece of writing. The words just flowed, as if by Divine grace. I didn’t know much about Twin flames or anything spiritual for that matter but his question stirred something deep within me and I had no choice but to lay my soul bare, speaking about our connection for the first time. This is what I shared with him.

“I thought about our last conversation and especially about when you asked me where I felt my home was.

I have to admit I did not give you my truest reply. You see, nobody ever asked me “Where is your home?”  I guess it’s quite ironic for someone who’s lived in and travelled to so many places. Nobody asked – only assumed. Maybe they thought they knew, maybe no one really cared. But you did: you asked. Now let me answer you from my heart.  

I have felt this all my life. If there was ever something I knew for sure, this was it. The deep longing, the sadness; a strong desire to be somewhere I couldn’t quite consciously grasp or define. There was a knowing in my heart that I was born in the wrong place, under the wrong skies. This is not my soul’s true home, I thought.  

Then came the questions without answers: why was I dreaming of faraway lands? Why did foreign languages come to me with such ease? Why did I identify so much with different cultures? I had the intense feeling that a part of me was somewhere out there, beckoning me … Something was missing and it was calling out to me.  

The older I got the more intense the feeling. Then came the searching; yet not knowing what I was looking for. And the more places I visited, the more obvious it was. Yes, the travelling felt good but none of the places I visited was “home”. But I knew it was out there and the certainty of it kept me going.

You see, “Home” can mean different places to different people but wherever it is, be it a dimension, another universe or the return God, it is that inner space of the heart that gives you an incredible feeling of rightness and warmth within. For those who truly love, home is not a place, it’s a feeling. Home is where you are welcome, accepted and loved. It’s warm, relaxing and open. It’s where our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are. It is a place filled with trust, patience and acceptance of each other’s weaknesses.

Home is where you don’t have to pretend or be on your guard. Instead of envy, irritation and exasperation, there is a great understanding, support, forgiveness and compassion. There is no judging, possessing, controlling, boundaries or competition. This is a place where you are loved more than you are needed.

One day you will all meet the person who will take you there. You will instantly know that you’ve known this person for eons, in many lifetimes and beyond. She is your polar opposite and like magnets you are being pulled together. Yet even in this most powerful energy field, you feel relaxed and totally at ease; engulfed in the warm security on a familiar ground. In their embrace you know you’ve come Home. Time and place are no longer matter.

There is an immediate tie between you which defies verbal description. You recognise yourself in them; those eyes you had looked upon so many times before in so many faces; so deep you could see their soul and touch the feeling of pure light and love inside. Like mirrors reflecting only your true self back to you. 

Your mind, heart and consciousness flow together from the same fountain. She is not only a mirror of mind and spirit, but of the soul, the secret longings and aspirations. You love this person like you love yourself, with no expectations or conditions attached to that love – because you are One. You know that life will never be the same and you feel truly blessed.


She is someone who reads you like an open book, who understands you in ways no one else can. She doesn’t have that raised eyebrow look that the rest of the world does. It is because she knows you inside out, yet the discovery never stops. You share the same soul blueprint and soul energy, the same essence. The vision, feeling and purpose are the same. You are like the two sides of a coin: one but not the same. Together you create the perfect balance and become more than just the sum of your parts; each part fitting the other, interlocking like Roman rings, stretching but never snapping apart. When one moves inward the other fills the gap and when one overflows, there will always be space to send that abundance towards the other.

The power of her love is not in what she tells you to do, but in what you are inspired to be. The measure of her love is not in how much you are able to love her, but in the way you are able to love others as a result of it. She understands that you may need to journey deep within to recognise the other within yourself and that there may be some false turns and mistaken identities in the process. Therefore her love comes with the freedom to explore life with whomever you wish because she knows in the end it will help you find your way back HOME, to her.

This love will not come without its challenges. Being with this person is like cradling your sacred self, but also facing every shadow, every part of yourself, leaving you with nowhere to hide. It has the potential to inspire great inner healing but only through dealing with a part of yourself that you have chosen not to look at for quite some time: the mirror of YOU in the other that reflects all that is within you.

As your mirror, she will make you experience yourself directly, not through your past experiences, beliefs or ego, but through your heart and soul. She’ll make you dig deeper, reach higher, shed light on parts of you that are painful for you to see. She will have no choice but to make you expand and confront yourself. You must be made empty so that light can come in and fill you… 

Some days you will be so lost that you wish she never existed and there are days you believe she never really did, except in your imagination. There will be days when you fail and those days will feel like you are going mad. Other days the mirage transforms itself into the oasis just long enough for you to rest a moment in her arms; just enough to simply “be” and feel her as a part of YOU again.

Sometimes we have to travel long and far before we recognize our true home. We may pass it by like a ship in the night. Maybe we are not ready to face it, maybe we are scared. We do not believe it is possible, we doubt it… So we run from it and keep travelling, searching for a place that feels like home, but isn’t… While we travel, our soul’s flame burns brightly, lighting the way for all parts of the soul that are in separation to return home to the heart of the soul.

So if you ask me where my home is, this is my answer”.

Within weeks of sharing the above with my Twin, we shared a beautiful and intense reunion. Years later, he is still the closest thing to home that I have ever known and I know one day we will return “home” together. For me, our ultimate homecoming will be the return to our original state of Oneness; a return to source, to our eternal life. Seeing the twin flame connection and all its challenges and blessings as simple steps towards this return gives me a sense of peace that I might otherwise have struggled to gain.

Please be reassured that even if your Twin flame is not physically part of your life, there IS comfort to be found in their energetic and spiritual presence. Earth itself begins to feel more like home, just because they are here. You see, the journey home takes us beyond the desire of a physical connection into the fulfilment of a “deeper longing than the flesh”; that of a shared consciousness. At this level you are already ONE; you are already in UNION – even when everything else is up for grabs. Even when your Twin flame is not physically present, you can still heal, evolve and continue to live without feeling like you are missing something inside. In fact, the twin is within you for you to connect with; for you to enjoy and love, be it near or far. Settling into this joyous realization is part of coming home.






Dear Readers and friends,

As you may recall, back in December I launched a giveaway to benefit the adoption of Evan, a 4-year old orphan from Eastern Europe. Today, I have some amazing news to bring you about Evan – as well as the giveaway!! I will also be announcing the winners!

First of all, a huge THANK YOU to all of you who donated, shared, blogged, prayed and held Evan in your hearts this past month! Together we raised an amazing $665!! I cannot tell you how proud I am of us as a community and as human beings! You are AMAZING!! I am also very excited to tell you that just a few days before the giveaway ended, the Orta family received a donation of $5,000 from a person they had come to know in the adoption circles and this, together with the money we raised, paid for the final part of the adoption. 🙂

Right this moment, the Orta family is in Armenia (Evan’s country) and in a few weeks, they will be able to return to the United States with him. On the 19th January 2016, he officially became their son and now goes by the name “Edgar”. I am delighted to be able to share the first pictures of them as a family of four!edgar3 edgar2

So now it’s my turn to announce the giveaway winners! As promised, I’ve allocated an entry for each $10 donated.winners

Breathing Underwater book – Jill Preshong & Victoria Harrison – ladies, please get in touch as I don’t have your contact details.

The other winners are: Bala Ramya R., Shivany, Laurie Z., and Inbar Y.

I will be emailing the winners individually however if you are a winner, can you please email me your postal address at mirrorofmysoulblog@gmail.com so that I may get the items posted out to you 🙂 Thank You!!

glitter congratulations


When twin flames meet, a powerful creative surge born out of the ignition and blending of their energetic and vibrational bodies completely shatters their illusion of time and space and is felt by BOTH Twins. This expansion is so powerful that it dissolves everything in its way to reveal the very special gift the Twin flame couple share: that of being able to bring forth that which is pure Spirit into the physical field of Creation. As creative expressions of God’s divine design, the Twins have within them the ability to co-create a new paradigm to replace the old. It is the very reason that Twin flames came here; to bring forth the NEW from the higher vibrational realities.

For the female twin, this creative surge is – certainly initially – felt in energetic pulsations originating in the lower pelvic and heart regions. Combined with the flow of kundalini, these sensations create an intense pull in the female reproductive organs, as old sexual cords to previous partners are “burnt” away and hidden DNA structures within our womb and ovaries (ethereal and physical) are activated. Feeling this region “come alive” and connect with our heart centre in such a vibrant and all-encompassing way is an intense experience which eventually pulls us out of the one dimensional way of feeling the connection (physical, sexual) into the multidimensional reality of cosmic Oneness.

One of the things this creative pulse often brings to surface is the need to procreate; after all, where else to pour this immense love than in the creation of a child together? Undeniably, for some of the incarnated counterparts currently being reunited this coming together involves having a child together, however for the majority it does not. Often this is simply not part of the Divine purpose the Twins are brought together. This however represents a problem and a dilemma for those Twins who are still trying to make the connection fit the old relationship template where the heart-pelvic pull alongside its biological effects would push the woman and man into physical union in order to conceive a child, thus continuing the cycle of life and binding the parents together for life. The twin flame couple however hardly needs this to form a lasting bond; they are already part of each other on all possible levels; spiritual, ethereal, emotional and energetic. Neither do they need to procreate in order to continue the cycle of life; the atomic and energetic merging and cosmic dance of their opposing polarities births the NEW continuously in multiple dimensions, thus endlessly perpetuating the cycle of life.

Undeniably though, the ignition of the seed of divine love and creative power definitely pushes the female twin’s cosmic creative and nurturing abilities up a notch or two; often bringing to the surface the yearning to have a child with our twin flame. We are still human after all; with our hormones and biological clocks, and with motherhood built deeply into the layers of our psyche and social status. For many of us, becoming a mother is something we know we want to experience.

While there is nothing wrong with wanting to have a child with our Twin flame, it is rarely something that organically happens in the Twin flame connection. The dynamic of the connection (geared towards self-realisation and return to Source rather than the often karmic task of child-rearing) rarely brings us the Union we dream of within the time-frame of our biological urges and abilities to create a child. Often, the female Twin ends up frustrated, wondering what she should do. On the one hand, she loves her Twin and KNOWS they are meant to be together. She wants the whole shebang with him: babies, marriage, mission, ascension… BUT the Twin is not available and perhaps even denies the existence of the connection. Either way, he is miles from being ready to procreate with her. On the other hand, she may have an existing life partner or perhaps a new man she knows she could have a comfortable life and family with – and more importantly, who wants her, NOW. What is a woman to do?83648c7c00b61b212f12e2485a7a154c

Oftentimes added to the dilemma is the fact that the woman is being bombarded by signs, dreams and visions of a child that she and her Twin are to have together. These dreams are so real and lucid, and often cross the veil between dream-time and our awakened state; bringing life-like sensations and experiences to us that stay with us for the rest of our life. It is hard to understand how to consolidate these with the reality of the connection (i.e. the silences and absence of our Twin); and with the love felt yet denied.

Bringing children forth onto the earth plane is a personal and individual decision, and not every Twin flame couple has chosen to partake in the hosting of newly incarnating souls together. Nevertheless, if it is in YOUR life purpose to assist with the rearing of a new soul, you WILL be made aware of this. Since the etheric birth cords form months before conception, it is not uncommon for the child to enter into communication with the future parent through dreams and visions. Life always finds a way and any child that is meant to born will be born; either with an existing partner or through a new whirlwind relationship, where the other twin quickly moves on and conceives a child.

Even though in such cases the child may not be biologically created by you and your Twin flame, it is the energy of the Union which has attracted the soul to you; after all, every soul wants to be born into the vibration of unconditional love. In fact, often one or both Twins sense that the conception happened during an astral meld between the Twin flame couple, indicating that our Twin flame is in fact the child’s spiritual parent. Often the male will feel the pregnancy even before the female does, even when the two are in no contact, and he may even feel the fetus’ heartbeat and movements within his own ethereal body.

From this it is clear that all the children born to either of the Twin flame couple are children of the union, regardless of who biologically fathers the child. Having a child with another may be part of agreements we must fulfil before Union; bringing important lessons of love, gratitude and responsibility for the twin flame parent; lessons which often assist the Union rather than going against it. In addition, the twin flame separation (which can last years or even decades) often provides the necessary gap in which to rear a family with a karmic connection – our maternal instincts take over and for a while we are able to put the twin flame union into the back-burner as we concentrate on raising the child(ren).

If you have or are contemplating stepping away from the twin flame connection to have a family with someone else, please do not feel guilty about it. You never know what the future holds but if you and your Twin flame are meant to reunite somewhere down the line it will happen, children or not. Allow the flow of life to take you where it needs to without worrying about the “what if’s”. On the other hand, if you are on the receiving end of the pain that comes with the reality that your Twin flame is having a child with another, please know this: no matter how you feel about it now, no one trapped your Twin into having this child. In fact, this child did not get created without YOUR consent. Drop the drama: if you are truly Twin flames, loving this child as part of the unconditional love you extend to your Twin flame will not be hard for you. In fact, many twin flames feel a deep parental bond with each other’s children, even though they may have never met them. Ultimately it does not matter how the child came into existence: you are always spiritually bonded to each other’s children; the child always a child of your heart.


Years ago I too went through a time of intense yearning for a child with my Twin flame. This craving seemed to be born out of my kundalini awakening and the unconditional love flowing through me; boosted by his first words to me after three years apart about how much he still wanted to marry his “polar opposite” and have children. Considering that he had once upon a time referred to me as such, it was hard for me not to link the two together when we subsequently passionately reunited and I started to have constant dreams, flashes and visions about giving birth. My 30th birthday was fast approaching and at that point I had been in the same long-term relationship for the past 8 years, knowing I did not want to bring children into it.

Nevertheless, as any woman who has ever felt the biological and hormonal NEED to procreate will tell you, I knew I was to have this child, no matter what. It wasn’t just the sound of my biological clock ticking; I was feeling “spiritually urged” to receive this child and sure enough soon the laughter of my children was resonating through all the dreams where my Twin flame also appeared. Unfortunately even when we seemed to share many of the same dreams, he denied the presence of children in his. It was hard not to get disheartened with his harsh “I never saw you as the mother of my children” when I was only trying to make sense of it all. For me those children were already real.

One particular dream that stuck to my mind was one where I gave birth to a baby boy. I remember lying on a hospital bed, surrounded a lot of people dressed in white, with my twin flame stood on my right side. To this day I remember the feeling of the baby’s floppy, warm body being laid onto my naked chest, the way he moved, the weight of him. I remember the feeling of his wet hair as I ran my fingers through it. Having never even held a new born baby, I was amazed to have the sensory accuracy of this experience confirmed to me a year or so down the line. In the dream, I distinctly remember my twin leaning in and whispering something in Arabic in the baby’s ear. I recognised it as the Islamic call to prayer. Of course I didn’t know it at the time, but according to the Islamic tradition, the first words a new baby should hear are the call to prayer – and it is the father who whispers this into the baby’s right ear. It is certainly no coincidence that my Twin soon thereafter told me that he had started to read the Quran and was finding a lot of comfort in it, and in fact years later he converted to Islam.earthmama

For a while I was quietly convinced that I was meant to have children with him; after all, it seemed too random that I would have been woken up spiritually after years of separation, reunited with him and then bombarded by visions of a child together – only to be denied both the reunion and the child. On the contrary, it made perfect sense that we were meant to do this together; we both wanted children and dreamt of a similar life; sharing deep values and love. Yet the reality of the connection was that he was now pulling away again, having told me he had “done his soul searching” and decided to remain in his marriage.

A few months later, still riding the wave of confusion between my Twin’s hints at deep feelings and denials of any possible future with me, I had another series of visions and dreams. In one that particularly stuck in my mind I was back in my native country, browsing around in a shop with my mother and three children, two boys and a girl. The weather outside was wet and cold, which made me think of late autumn weather. Suddenly my phone rang and I was surprised to hear my Twin’s voice on the other end. Clearly he had not called me for a very long time. He basically told me that I was the one he had always loved and how he wasn’t afraid anymore. After all these years, he was finally ready to be with me and to see where the road would take us. I fell down on my knees sobbing out of sheer relief.

The dream stayed with me vividly for many reasons; one of which was that it was clear these children were mine but not his. They were no longer babies either; indicating that the separation had been long. The dream had been just as real as the others, yet I refused to entertain the idea that these precious children were not going to be my Twin’s. I simply could not see how I could ever want another man after the intense purification I had gone through to reach this vibration of unconditional love for him.

Nevertheless, a few months later it became clear that I was paying too high an emotional price for hanging on. After one last conversation which confirmed to me that this was not meant to be, I left everything behind and set off to the travel the world. Unexpectedly I met a man who seemed to know what he wanted and who was serious about building a family together. I remember looking at him and just knowing I was meant to have children with him. This man was a God-sent: unlike my Twin, he was there for me every step of the way as I finally once and for all moved on from the abusive relationship I had been in.

When we married six months later I was already pregnant with our first child, a boy. When my Twin found out about my marriage and pregnancy, he remained silent and did not even congratulate me. It was only once the baby was born and I sent him a picture that he tearfully replied, telling me how emotional he felt seeing me holding the baby with my “tender maternal yet firm” arms. I knew things had unfolded just as they were supposed to, however it took a decade for my children, two boys and a girl, to grow enough for me to remember and recognize them as the children in my dream. They are exactly as I envisioned them all those years ago.

In conclusion, it is true that we as women have been blessed with the ability to act as portals between the Spirit world and the human experience and that many of us will accept the task of bringing new souls into this world, even if this is unlikely to be with our Twin flame. However beyond the decision to have children together or not, Twin flames are always co-creators, always love, always One. They share the gift of authentic heart creation, as well as shared responsibility to nurture and help ripen the seed of divine love, ignited by the male in the woman. She often bears the burden of this seed until it is ready to manifest into the physical world, very much as if she was carrying a child. In the meantime, the twin flames have a duty to use their creative impulses and the gift of authentic heart creation to advance their own spiritual journey, help others and to bring balance to their Union.essence_of_life_by_inertiak


CLICK HERE to share Reece’s Rainbow on Your Blog! Thank you!


I wanted to ask you all to consider helping me make a very special Christmas wish come true for the amazing Orta family (GA, USA) who are looking to rescue and bring home a little boy from an Eastern European orphanage in January 2016. So please, if you’ve gotten value from this blog in 2015 and you are feeling charitable and Christmassy, please consider donating to Bring Evan Home.

To encourage your donations, I have decided to do GIVEAWAY. For each $10 donated, you will get one entry into the prize draw which will be drawn at noon GMT on the 18th January 2016. if you donate $50, you will get 5 entries & so on. Winners will be notified on the same day – and items posted by airmail on the 19th January 2016.

If you want to be entered into the giveaway, all you need to do is to forward a copy of the “Thank you for your donation to Help us rescue Evan from the orphanage!” email which you will receive from GoFundMe to my email at mirrorofmysoulblog@gmail.com. If you have already donated, you will be entered into the prize draw automatically (unless of course you donated anonymously, in which case you should forward me your confirmation).

The Story of why you should support Evan

Six years ago when as I was expecting my daughter (who had been prenatally diagnosed with Down Syndrome) I came across Reece’s Rainbow. Reece’s is a US based charity which helps to advocate and find families for orphans with Down’s Syndrome (DS) and other special needs by raising funds or adoption grants and promoting awareness. While nowadays it is possible for many individuals with DS to live happy and fulfilling lives, in many places around the world children like my daughter are abandoned shortly after birth and viewed as outcasts with no ability to learn or to be functional members of society. Often these children are transferred into adult mental institutions at a very young age (in some countries as young as 5) and many don’t live to see their 6th birthday.

I was so deeply touched by the stories of children like my daughter from all around the world that a year or so after her birth I found myself drawn into advocating and fundraising for orphaned children with DS (without knowing it, my Twin flame was also active in the adoption circles at the time; trying to adopt a boy and a girl with his wife). Then, BOOM, back in 2013, one little boy on Reece’s website stole my heart – Meet Evan!


Evan is a 4-year old little boy from Eastern Europe who was abandoned at just one month old because he has Down Syndrome. Isn’t he just precious!!! Unfortunately where he is from, children like him face a life behind crib bars, with no medical care, few diaper changes, fed broth maybe once a day, rarely (if ever) held or taken outside. So when at the beginning of 2014 I saw that a family from Georgia, USA, had committed to giving Evan a forever home, I got in touch with Christie (the mum) to see how I could help.


Just like me, the Orta family had fallen in love with Evan the moment they saw his sweet face on Reece’s Rainbow. They are an amazing family with so much love to give. In their hearts he is already their cherished son and a much adored little brother to Laura. They have everything Evan needs to live a fulfilling and happy life: not only will he have so much LOVE, but all his medical and therapeutic needs will be taken care of. His new mum Christie is an Early Childhood Special Education teacher with many years of experience working with children with disabilities (including DS).

The total cost of Evan’s adoption is about $38,000 and the Ortas along with family, friends (including me) and the Community have already raised a bulk of this through their fundraising efforts in the past 2 years! They are now preparing for a final trip to Eastern Europe to bring Evan home in January 2016 (flights are already booked!!), however they still need to raise about $5,000 to complete the adoption. So dear readers, friends and fellow bloggers who read me in your thousands every day from all around the world…  You may not be in a position to adopt a child but maybe you are in a position to help ONE CHILD find a home? Maybe you could give $5 or maybe $50 or maybe more? 100% of donations received will go directly to Evan’s adoption. This fundraiser does not benefit me in anyway – and for those of you in the US, your donations are tax deductible.

You can donate directly to the Orta’s GoFundMe page: https://www.gofundme.com/4wdtv0

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for anything that YOU are able to contribute…even if you are only able to share Evan’s story with your friends and family. Every child deserves a loving home and a family – and I want to ensure this time next year there is at least one orphan less in the world!

God Bless you all and have a lovely holiday season.

Love, Jonna  xx

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