The Runner

runner

You asked me why I ran away,
no promises were broken.
It’s not because of words you said;
but because of those unspoken.
For the mirror there, within your heart,
showed who You are to Me,
and I knew that nothing could hold me back,
if the longing inside me broke free.

See, the search of a lifetime ended
 when my soul was laid bare in our kiss
The answer to all my dreams and hopes,
to everything I daren’t wish.
Like a magician, mixing science and art,
cradling me tenderly, with a smile in your heart,
You turned emptiness into Love I knew not existed,
my illusion of reality shattered and twisted.

Undeniably, that summer, you made my head spin,
as I helplessly watched you crawl under my skin.
Me, then a prisoner of my self-made chains,
You, unafraid, made your home in my veins.

The light of your love lifted pain to surface;
your acceptance, there, to lighten the burden,
But when demons arose, not what I expected,
you turned your back, left me feeling rejected.

You weren’t there, when you should have been,
I turned but you were nowhere to be seen.
No explanation, no reason I could find,
no escape from the pain, no place to hide.
I must have been blind; nothing is as it seems;
as I said goodbye to my desires and dreams.

I prayed to God that I could forget:
about you, and I, and that summer we met,
Missing you more than words can say;
 still, in my heart, you were there each day.
Your voice asking me why I always hide,
I laugh, “My dearest, I never left your side!”
‘Cause even in my world, ever so cold,
you’ll always be my man, as I let life unfold.

  You still linger here in an indelible mark;
closer to the edge, you beckon from the dark.
If I trust and leap, will you break my fall?;
here I go, crash again, I stumble and crawl.
If you know, tell me why, this urge to leap so strong;
as I wake, no paradise, how to choose: right or wrong?

Other nights, as I leap, you carry me, then disappear,
You voice rings in echo, “How did you find me here?”
With a promise of a moment, when tired from trying;
We will soar like eagles, we will find ourselves flying!

For true love, ever new; is never anchored in the past.
As souls, we only get, one eternal moment that will last.
Let me hold you for an instant, before anew we are torn apart;
I love you, remember, that your home is in my heart.

I have learnt life moves in circles,
and that true love never dies;
That hope, faith and love,
erase all doubt, fear and lies.
God, in his wisdom, created this blessing;
for a while, hesitant, we are to keep guessing;
Until, surrendered, we no longer fight;
and unashamed, as One, step into the light.

 No doubt exists, in the heart of my hearts;
then, it will seem like we’ve never been apart.
For the Love of our souls, finally free flowing;
its seed in our hearts never stopped growing.
Love bows in reverence, and in kindness;
it keeps no count of past wrongs or blindness,
For I know, you also in your heart suffered;
and died a death when you finally remembered.

by Jonna, 27th November 2014

This poem always makes me think of “Language of the Heart” by David Willcox. It is probably one of the saddest and most beautiful songs ever. It will resonate with everyone who has ever had a “runner” or who has ever ran from love.

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